by Sara Beth Stoltzfus

Being a parent can be tough. Returning to the role of parent as a 65 year old can be exhausting.

Now, I do not know this from personal experience. I am a 28 year old childless woman. I know this from what I have seen and heard from the grandmas and grandpas I have worked with through the Methodist Children’s Home (MCH) Family Outreach Grandparents as Parents Program (GAPP).

The Grandparents as Parents Program offers supportive in-home services to grandparents raising their grandchildren. The program includes case management, information and referrals for community resources, workshops, assistance with legal issues, and support groups.

Through this program, I have had the privilege of walking alongside young grandparents, older grandparents, grandparents with money, and grandparents with almost no income at all. Some grandparents come to our program seeking legal support, some because they are not making it financially, and some come because their grandchildren have been through so much physical and emotional trauma that they are constantly battling the problem behaviors that result. Some grandparents are just looking for someone to talk with, vent with, and cry with…someone to let them know that they are not alone.

All are coming to our doors because they love their grandchildren.

More and more grandparents are raising their grandchildren. In the United States, approximately 5.8 million children are living in grandparent homes. Similarly, almost 2 million children are living in the home of other relatives. (AARP, 2015). The AARP writes that grandparent caregivers and the children they are raising are frequently isolated. “They lack information about the range of support services, resources, programs, benefits, laws and policies available to help them successfully fulfill their caregiving role.” (AARP, 2015).

Grandparents serving as parents face a whole range of issues that the typical parent may not face. The U.S. Census found that grandparents living with a grandchild in 2012 were more likely to face poverty than those who did not live with a grandchild (Williams, 2012). A 2013 article in the Washington Post cited that 20% of grandparents raising grandchildren are living in poverty (Bahrampour, 2013). Grandparents are often not financially prepared for children to enter their home. This means they often have to take on a second, or even third job to pay for their grandchildren’s needs. Sometimes grandparents quit jobs that they once had in order to be able to adequately care for a child with special needs. While there is some financial help available for grandparents in specific situations, there is not enough financial assistance as many of these families need to feed growing children and themselves. Grandparents are also not getting any younger and often have health issues of their own to deal with. These financial and physical health challenges are highly prevalent amongst grandparents raising grandchildren. The need for greater support for these courageous grandparents is significant.

One of the greatest joys of working with the GAPP Program is facilitating a support group for these grandparents. I love watching one grandparent light up with deep understanding as another grandparent shares their story. I feel great satisfaction hearing a grandparent say they no longer feel so alone. Grandparents serving as parents are dealing with a lot of emotions. They shed tears regularly over their adult child’s drug addiction, another child’s domestic violence charges, the death of an adult child and the many other reasons their grandchild is staying with them. They wish for more for their adult children, but they work hard to set boundaries in order to keep their grandkids safe. Every story is different, but none is without complications.

Many grandparents feel very blessed to have a second chance to parent again. They know they’ve learned lessons over the years. They are often more patient the second time around. While the journey is not easy, most grandparents I’ve talked to feel very blessed by the entrance of their grandchildren into their lives.

We need to support our grandparents serving as parents. They are spending their golden years running around with toddlers, staying up into the night with a traumatized 8 year old, and learning to use a computer for the first time in order to relate to their teenage grandchild. All of the grandchildren that come to live with their grandparents have experienced some type of trauma. This is often trauma the grandparents are not prepared to address. Grandparents as parents need not only programs, such as GAPP and support groups, but a community of support. Grandparents as parents are indeed unsung heroes to our communities’ children.

One quote I often share with the grandparents I work with is:

“The more healthy relationships a child has, the more likely he will be to recover from trauma and thrive. Relationships are the agents of change and the most powerful therapy is human love.” –Bruce Perry

This quote also inspires and strengthens me in this work.

If you know a grandparent you would like to refer to our program or would like more information, please call 254-750-1263.

This Act Locally Waco blog post was written by Sara Beth Stoltzfus. Sara Beth is a case manager at the MCH Family Outreach office through the Methodist Children’s Home. Sara Beth received her master’s degree in Social Work from the University of Texas at Austin. Sara Beth is originally from Pennsylvania but has been living in Texas for almost 6 years, 4 of which have been spent in Waco.

The Act Locally Waco blog publishes posts with a connection to these aspirations for Waco. If you are interested in writing for the Act Locally Waco Blog, please email ashleyt@actlocallywaco.org for more information.

 by Gary Lee Webb, DTM

Do you have trouble getting through a job interview? Are you uncomfortable speaking in front of people you do not know? Would you like to be better at responding to a surprise question? Or better at marshalling your thoughts and presenting your ideas? Perhaps you have a job, but wish to move up to a supervisory position? Or perhaps, you just wish to be a better speaker/presenter at church, work, or other organizations?

If any of these apply to you, Toastmasters International can help. Toastmasters is an international non-profit organization. We are 300,000 people helping people to learn how to communicate better, and we have been doing it for 90 years. Toastmasters offers participants a way to practice communication skills in a supportive environment, a way to meet more experienced speakers and see them in action, and a way to expand one’s horizons across the world. We are a self-paced program, with helpful, individual mentors, usually divided into chapters of roughly 20 people, generally meeting weekly or bi-weekly (see directions below on how to get info on local chapters). There is high level training available for those who want it,

Toastmasters provides a very friendly environment in which beginners can learn, in front of a non-critical audience, that speaking is not hard. Participants go on to learn basic presentation skills, and, as they improve, gain the confidence that they are capable and even excellent speakers. They can either participate in a group (Speechcraft) or learn at their own pace (with a mentor); either way they will get positive criticism, aimed at helping them improve. As they practice, they will periodically see more experienced presenters (at club, contest, or conference), which may help guide their steps to being a better presenter. Eventually, participants discover that it does not matter whether the audience is friendly or not – they know they speak well.

At the same time they are learning public speaking skills, participants are also learning how to handle those surprise questions, learning to marshal their thoughts, and how to respond well. This is a valuable skill particularly in an interview. Interviewers often resort to surprise questions, to see how the applicant responds. A sage response after brief thought could be the key to getting the job.

Toastmasters also develops leadership skills: listening, evaluating, organizing your thoughts, speaking in a way that you are believed, persuasive, or inspirational…in short, getting your message across and convincing people of its wisdom…these skills are a strong foundation for any leader. Participants also learn useful skills like organizing and running a meeting well, or putting together and managing a major project. I know people who used their new skills to get that supervisor position they wanted.

This is our mission statement: “We provide a supportive and positive learning experience in which members are empowered to develop communication and leadership skills, resulting in greater self-confidence and personal growth.”   I believe we do it very well indeed: I have seen people become great speakers, authors, and leaders. It is a deep and wide program, with many options for learning and participation.

Members who wish to hold the highest honors demonstrate what they have learned by teaching others. As participants grow in the program they have opportunities to teach new speakers in Speechcraft, teach teenagers in Youth Leadership, teach management skills, and to teach leaders or trainers, as well as many other options. Not all of these are required, but I have done several to my benefit. I can proudly say I am a Distinguished ToastMaster (DTM), signifying I have delved deeply into the program, learning both communication and leadership.

What makes Toastmasters especially valuable is not just the practice, but the immediate feedback and the good role models. The manuals not only train the speaker, they guide the evaluator in what to look for, so that he may better tell the speaker how to improve. And after 90 years of improvement, the manuals are very good.

Moreover, the member will see better speakers to emulate. If the ones in his or her chapter are not good enough, there are other chapters to visit. Twice per year, there is a series of contests, in which members can compete against members from other chapters. The contest winners compete across larger regions, and then across the state. The international contest climaxes with the winner from each of the almost 100 districts world-wide competing in semi- and world finals. Last year (2014), I saw D.J. Swinyar win in the District 25 contest and get flown to Malaysia for the 2014 finals. Contests are optional, only about 10% of members compete, but those who are interested can learn, just by watching. There are also many other optional training opportunities.

In short, Toastmasters is a unique opportunity to improve oneself: as a speaker, as a leader, and in many other ways. The skills are valuable, and so are the friendships. We generally do our best to help each other out, and we tend to be willing to meet and network across the globe. I have become acquainted with astronauts, top businessmen, world champions, and great authors; I personally know toastmasters in three continents. The basic cost is $72 per year (prorated for a partial year); individual chapters may add local dues (there are seven chapters in the Waco area). And there is a $20 initial fee for a new member (pays for the initial manuals). That is incredibly cheap compared to other options for this kind of development. Toastmasters is a very cost-effective way to learn.

I hope you will consider coming and visiting one of our chapters – guests are always welcome. If you like what you see, if you think it will help you grow into a more capable person, I hope you will consider joining. For details of when and where we meet, you can e-mail me at GaryLeeWebb@D25Toastmasters.org or check out the international web site, www.toastmasters.org, and put in your zip code after clicking “Find a Club” on the top bar.

Gary Lee Webb is a 17-year resident of Waco.   He recently completed a successful year as a president’s distinguished Division Governor for Toastmasters International, guiding 29 central Texas chapters. His credits include film chairman for the 1982 West Coast Science Fiction Convention, over 360 public speeches, assisting at both high school and adult speech contests, and over 40 publications (14 fiction). He is 59, married 38 years, with 4 daughters.

The Act Locally Waco blog publishes posts with a connection to these aspirations for Waco. If you are interested in writing for the Act Locally Waco Blog, please email ashleyt@actlocallywaco.org for more information.

by Dawn Wible

•  A friend blankly stares across the table while you check your texts.  As she anxiously awaits an answer, you have no idea what she just said.
• Your four year old is describing his new friend at school, but you are busy scrolling through the newsfeed and missing the whole story.
• Vegging on the couch was the agenda for the night but instead you are responding to a work email at 11:15pm, because really, what are “work hours” these days anyway?

We have all found ourselves in these situations, myself included. It truly is a sign of the times.

The two questions I ask myself are: “Why am I choosing to put my relationships on the back burner?” and “When and where is the best time to be on my device?” I believe we do not even realize we are making these small and influential choices.  Statistics and studies are actually showing a change in our brain function due to technology addiction. Many neurologists and psychologists are pointing to our dependence on technology as the root of many mental, physical, emotional, spiritual, social and relational issues. These issues range from poor academic or job performance, to job loss, lack of social connectedness, sleep disorders, divorce and in some cases even death.

There’s a crucial conversation happening in our culture concerning the problem of tech addiction, and my family and I want to be a part of the solution! This idea has become so important to the mental health of my family that we started a local movement: Talk more. Tech less.

Talk More Tech Less is for myself, and essentially anyone who uses technology in this tech heavy culture. This is not an anti-technology movement; it is a pro-relationship movement. I’m a mom of three BOYS and technology is very much a part of my family’s life. But, we struggle with the overuse and addiction that causes tantrums, irritability, ignoring, zoning out…you get the picture.  Like most of you, my phone is my home and work computer in hand.  It helps me to be efficient – way more efficient than I would be without my device.  It is valuable, but it also distracts me from the life going on right in front of me.  I realized a few years back that I needed to shift my perspective and priorities.  I saw it not only in my own life, but in society as well. We can get lots of information, facts and communication from our phones, but what we’re missing is the emotion, the conversation, and the connection that should come with communication.

Talk More Tech Less was birthed from mentoring and spending time with teenagers. My husband, Matt, runs a Waco based organization called Field Guides that mentors young men through outdoor activities. We have seen first- hand the benefits of getting young men away from all the distraction and overuse of technology, video games, smart-phones and computers and getting them outside!  As the CRC Health Group says, “There is a strong body of research confirming that direct contact with nature increases mental health and psychological and spiritual development. Benefits include stress reduction, a sense of coherence and belonging, improved self-confidence and self-discipline, and a broader sense of community.”

At Field Guides summer camps we have participants take one-week breaks from their phones.  Working with these guys year after year our eyes have been opened to some true dependency issues involving technology.  We have also been privileged to see the breakthroughs that happened as they embraced this process. With those experiences as background I began researching tech dependency and addiction stats and saw the great need in this culture for balance and freedom.

Last summer we had the campers construct boxes for their phones.  We encouraged them to take the boxes home and use them with their families.  The idea is that family members place their phones in these “Detox Boxes” during meal times and other important moments during the day and night.

Our own family’s experience with technology balance, my research into this subject, and the success of this “detox box” idea convinced me that other people could benefit from a structured way to explore and reduce dependency on technology.  That led me to create the Talk More Tech Less 30 Day Experience.  The 30 day experience is designed to strengthen relationships and create awareness about the overuse of technology. It is a guide to empower individuals, families, and groups to find balance, leading to greater connection.  I hope it will help those who use it gain control of this growing concern in our culture and world.

The 30 Day Experience includes a custom made “Detox Box”, 30 daily note cards, a journal and a decal. The box is created to place our devices in during strategic times throughout the day.  They are locally crafted here in the 254, by Sticker Universe and Hole in the Roof Marketing.  The daily note cards are a true journey to healthy technology usage. Each card takes approximately 90 seconds per day, so as not to take up time, but to give it back. Those involved are actually surprised at how much time they have on their hands during the 30 days.

Research shows negative effects from the lack of face-to-face, eye contact, physical, spiritual and emotional contact. In the 30 Day Experience we pool all that information and combine it with practical ways to deal with and replace this dependency issue. Talk More Tech Less is designed to bring conversation and connection back to our culture. We’d love you to be a part of this movement! For more information please visit us at www.talkmoretechless.com

Dawn Wible is the creator of Talk More. Tech Less.  She is a Waco resident and graduate of Baylor University. Her husband, Matt founded and runs an outdoor ministry, Heart of Texas Field Guides, that mentors young men through outdoor activity. Together they raise 3 amazing boys, Levi, Jude and Ty. Dawn finds life in deep connection with family and friends, volunteering, kayaking, cooking, jogging and she loves a good party.

The Act Locally Waco blog publishes posts with a connection to these aspirations for Waco. If you are interested in writing for the Act Locally Waco Blog, please email ashleyt@actlocallywaco.org for more information.

By Cecelia Rodriguez

Do you have an older friend, or perhaps a friend with a disability, who is on a limited income? Booth Garden Apartments might be the perfect home for him or her. We are proud of the environment we have created here at Booth Gardens, and we would like to make sure that those who might need a place like Booth know that it is here for them.

The Booth Garden Apartments are an independent housing community owned and managed by the Salvation Army. We provide safe and comfortable living conditions at affordable costs for seniors, and those with federally defined disabilities, who have limited incomes. At Booth Garden Apartments, residents can live in an atmosphere of love, acceptance and encouragement.

The Booth Gardens Apartments are one-connected building, but they are actually two separate projects: William Booth (which faces N. 19th) and Catherine Booth Garden Apartments (which faces Stewart Dr.). William Booth was first opened for occupancy in 1983 and Catherine Booth was later opened for occupancy in 1997.

The buildings are four stories high, and together contain 196 one bedroom apartments. The apartments include added amenities especially designed to benefit our two target audiences: persons 62 years of age or older, and persons 18 or older who have a federally defined disability. William Booth is for those who are 62 years of age or older and also for those that are at least 18 years of age with a federally defined disability. Catherine Booth is just for senior citizens, 62 years of age or older.

We contract with HUD (U.S. Department of Housing and Urban Development) which provides subsidized rent for our residents. The apartments are reserved to be safe, comfortable homes for people with limited income. Annual income limitations (which are subject to change annually) are currently $19,150.00 per year for a single person and $21,900.00 per year for couples. The exact rent charged is based on a formula which takes into account the residents’ adjusted gross income, assets and medical expenses.

Here are some of the things residents appreciate about living at Booth Gardens:

• A group of our residents have formed a very active “Tenant Council” which meets monthly. They lead numerous activities ranging from trips to lunch fundraisers and are continuously working to be a voice for our residents.
• We offer a variety of activities including weekly bus trips to H-E-B and Walmart.
• There is a 24 hour response system in case of emergencies. Emergency pull-cords are available near the beds and in the bathrooms of each apartment and can be put to use in case of a medical emergency.
• Multi-faith groups come-in to conduct spiritual programs. We also enjoy a variety of educational programs hosted by local home healthcare agencies.
• We have a resident chaplain, Major Harvey Harwell. He leads regular Bible studies and devotion times and offers counseling to those who need it.
• Our resident services coordinator, Mrs. Barbara Parnell, is also available to help residents meet their own needs.
• Domesticated pets are welcome.
• We have a total of 3 laundry facilities.
• Although we are independent living, many of our residents have private contracts with home-health care agencies that enable them to remain independent.
• We have a partnership with “Meals and Wheels” program which provides lunch meals to our residents three days a week.
• Friends for Life is a partner and has helped some of our residents meet financial management and budgeting needs. This also helps them to stay independent longer.

It has been an honor and a pleasure to serve with The Salvation Army Booth Garden Apartments for the past 10 years.  I cherish every moment participating in and assisting with housing for senior citizens.  Several years ago I lost my mother, who was disabled, and shortly after, an elderly aunt. They are my inspiration for being part of this wonderful ministry. Like many others, they were on limited means of income, and faced health challenges. They struggled to maintain the aging, deteriorating home in which they lived. We hope that our residents are able to be as independent as possible, for as long as possible and receive the dignity and respect they deserve in a safe and affordable home. If you know someone who is looking for a home who you think might be a good fit for the Booth Gardens, please contact us! You may contact me, Cecilia Rodriquez by email at Cecilia_Rodriquez@uss.salvationarmy.org, or our Assistant Director, Rachel Sheridan at Rachel_Sheridan@uss.salvationarmy.org, or call either of us at (254) 757-2242. We look forward to hearing from you!

This Act Locally Waco blog post is by Cecilia Rodriquez.  Cecilia began her ministry with The Salvation Army Booth Gardens Apartments as the receptionist 10 years ago and is now the Director of both properties.  She is a Certified Manager of Housing and Certified Occupancy Specialist through the National Center for Housing Management.  She has a passion for senior citizens and also enjoys being an active part in her children’s lives coaching in her spare time.  She is family-driven and thrives on helping to make a difference in people’s lives as she carries out the mission of The Salvation Army.

The Act Locally Waco blog publishes posts with a connection to these aspirations for Waco. If you are interested in writing for the Act Locally Waco Blog, please email ashleyt@actlocallywaco.org for more information.

By David Saucedo

The Reinforced Earth Company is a precast concrete company that is part of a national and international conglomerate comprised of construction, technology and concession companies, among others. We are located in China Springs and we employ between 150 to 160 people, many of which are Waco residents.

My personal passion for community change and empowerment has played out in many ways over the last four to five years, but the last two years have been amazing! When I was hired at Reinforced Earth in 2013, I never thought the most enlightening and fulfilling work so far would take place at this company, but it has. I was blessed with opportunities, and I advanced to become the Safety Coordinator in late 2013. This promotion opened doors that I would have never imagined and allowed me to work with some terrific people who have taught me a great deal about what we call “foundational employment” – employment that is foundational to a stable lifestyle.

The Reinforced Earth Company’s Waco plant, managed by James Ashley, is paving a new road in employee development. We focus on a quality made product, produced in a timely manner, as safely as possible. But most importantly we are aiming to promote healthy and stable lifestyles to the men in our community that work here. From a business perspective, it goes without saying that a high turnover rate interferes with those goals and makes it very hard to establish maximum efficiency. In 2014 our company on average employed 58 workers per month through local staffing agencies. This not only increased the cost of producing our product, but it also led to a workforce with less experience and more potential for mistakes or injuries.

We began our work in foundational employment by using encouraging messages in our safety toolbox meetings. For example, we would use words like, “This is a family out here,” or “We want you to use Reinforced Earth as a foundation for your family.” We encouraged car pools to help employees who didn’t have transportation, showing that we are here to help. We introduced simple budget spreadsheets and encouraged employees to ask how they could escape the check-to-check lifestyle. Our most recent, and I think our most fruitful step has been referring and encouraging our employees to a local psychiatrist that is covered by our insurance. In some cases we even covered the copay for employees who are more serious about improving their standard of living.

I’m very proud to report that this month we will be reporting that fewer than 20 employees are working at Reinforced Earth through local staffing agencies. We have increased production and decreased our production hours by improving our production procedures and focusing on better training and efficiencies. By no means would our efforts be considered a comprehensive study, but we are seeing results and we associate these results with the investments we are making in our employees.

From these experiences, I’m very confident that a company dedicated to promoting strong foundations in the lives of their employees will see improvements in the quality of their workforce, a decrease in their turn over, a reduction in overhead, and — the icing on the cake — an increase in their profits. What would our community look like if more companies were encouraged to promote strong and healthy foundations in the lives of their employees? That’s a question I have been asking myself more and more.

This Act Locally Waco blog post was written by David Saucedo. David is a local minister with Life Church Waco and has committed the last 8 years of his life to impacting his community in a positive way. David has a loving wife, Michelle and three beautiful children, Lianna (7), Isaiah (4) and Isaac (10 Months).

The Act Locally Waco blog publishes posts with a connection to these aspirations for Waco. If you are interested in writing for the Act Locally Waco Blog, please email ashleyt@actlocallywaco.org for more information.